During the night I thought of a particular dream shared in a dream group and I felt some strong understanding about it all, relating to a male figure. I certainly wanted to project it strongly onto its owner, that she was creating an environment that was not good within her.

The male figure relates to the Animus or inner man, in a woman’s dream. He showed up  in her dream, as a prominent public figure, disliked and doing nefarious things to the environment.

The negative animus can show up as someone, who has not our best interest at heart, luring us into dangerous decisions. If we have an eating disorder or if we are suicidal, the thoughts of the negative animus are a problem.

The animus figure is based on the father of the dreamer, whether the influence is through absence or presence. At the very least a woman may take on the opinions of the father and as she gets older, those opinions will not serve her very well. 

Emily Dickson wrote into one of her poems about this negative animus as a “loaded gun.”

I dream about  a pool and there are women exercising in the water. The pool is small and has a bad green color. Then I notice the big windows and I go toward them and see all the beautiful blue and white ocean just outside. The colors are pearly. I want to go out but those inside do not want me going out, as it is dangerous in their opinion. 

This dream brings me back to the time I went to India, Benares. We had an early morning ride on a boat, to watch the sun come up, to meditate, and then go to a place on the water where chai tea is served. We wait our turn as there are lots of boats there. They are open and the river has a vast expanse. There is a long walk up steps to the shopping area above. 

I was sick of waiting and was ready to take off my sweater and jump into the river. There was a communal shout at me and I was stricken into pulling my sweater back on and sitting quietly until I got my tea. 

When I returned to my lodgings, I resolved to get in the water. Nobody was available, as all had gone shopping. It was November and the water was not high at the edges of the river and a number of locals or visitors were in the shallow edge of the Ganges water, scooping water and pouring it over themselves.  There were boys swimming and jumping in the river farther out. 

There was a big round created circle just under the water about seven feet out, which was easy to access. I was wearing clothes over my swimsuit as it was better to be covered up. I was “kept an eye on” by those near by, as I dipped and dunked myself in the river. There are stories that Jesus traveled to India, to this city to study, and I was pleased to consider myself to be in a place where his footsteps had been in the distant past. 

When I got on that underwater circle and considered jumping off into the deeper water, I was again treated to shouts to keep me from doing this. I again obeyed, staying in the shallows, happy to be fully immersed in the river. 

It was beautiful, to be in this most sacred of rivers. There were little shrines by the steps and one man was inside the shrine with a toddler over whom he was praying, as he lit his incense beside him and chanted his prayers. 

The above dream is interpreting me. What danger is being referred to in this dream?

I am creating a personal exercising pool, when compared to the beautiful ocean outside is sick. 

My personal pool has that color of green associated with puke. I am the one creating a terrible environment inside me through the opinions of my inner negative masculine. It is pushy and has criticizing opinions about the relationship and marriage. 

In my meditation, I have seen this marvelous pearly blue and in the dream it is coupled with the ocean. 

As I find myself in a threshold place, of marriage to my partner of four years, I have to let go of  my doubts and fears. I am not right in my thoughts, unless I go on out to that beautiful blue pearly feminine energy that is right outside the window that pulls love into the relationship. After all it is the reason for being on this earthly journey. 

Those women inside at the personal pool of mean thoughts do not have my best interest at heart and now that I have the visual of this versus that, I have to consider only doing that which brings me to that ocean of love. 

Ding dong the bells are going to chime, I am getting married in the morning. Love from Rose Marie.