Mariah’s Toothache

Mariah had a little tooth ache

She tried to ignore her tooth for as long as she could because of her previous experiences with the dwarves. She forgot about her tooth most of the time but experience had thought her that this ignorance is not bliss and she needed to make her move before the weather got too bad and made travel impossible. A cold swallow, which gave her a sharp pain, first thing that morning, got her thinking in the right direction of taking care of the problem. 

Snow fall

However when she looked out the door, she saw that a few inches of snow had fallen. She had to think twice about going out. Uishneach had been out already and in again and had trailed a bunch of snow all over the place. She felt in a temper about these mud puddles and threw his house slippers at him as she admonished him to not track any more mud into the living space. He was in no mood to remove his shoes for her but her glare changed his mind. She watched him take off one shoe for a few minutes and absently mindedly put it on again.

She wanted to tell him of the latest nerve jumping in her mouth. He wondered how she would be able to get to see the tooth dwarves, seeing as, she was against getting snow on shoes. She said testily that she would use her bat wings. Uishneach though this was funny. She relaxed, as she wondered what she would do now. Uishneach found his potion of clove oil, which she rubbed on her offending tooth.


They usually held the offending weapon behind their backs until she was half out of it and would quietly submit to their method of leverage. Once she fainted when she was young and the dwarf though she was dead but she came quickly around and he sent her home refusing to do anything else with her offending mouth that day. He sent for a pitcher and drank deeply of some strong smelling liquid to calm his nerves.

The dwarf kept some secrets under his hat.

At lunch time Druid Bernie came in to her turf fire with his feet frozen and wet. She poured some hot water into a tin tub and he pulled up his brown robes, bared his knobby knees and rested into the warmth of the hot water. She gave him some tea and refused her glass of stronger stuff saying he was a little afraid of such stuff while there was a threat of more snow around. After he was suitably heated she mixed some of the clove oil with other oils she kept and a mutton tallow mixture and he rubbed it into his feet and lower legs. His socks and shoes dried out on the hob and he was very pleased to feel warm and toasty again.

She would wait until the afternoon and see if the sun melted the snow enough for a little travel. She would try and find out which tooth dwarf would be available, the father or the daughter, and send word to find out when would be a good time to arrive for some attention. The dwarves had to have their own ways about which method they used. What ever they did she would have to breath deeply, drink a potion and hope it would be over before she figured out which method they would use.

Mariah told Druid Bernie a dream about her teeth. She had a dream that one of her top teeth, toward the front of her mouth, had three diamonds, shining brightly out of her mouth. He hummed and hawed and went off into a speal about teeth being the defense and that if you dream of them all falling out than your defenses are down. No, her teeth are not falling out, except for the one needing to be taken out. Maybe it is connected he said. Mariah was impatient with his connection to defenses. She did not have an “ahah” moment about that.

The Dwarf from Egypt

She said that the diamonds, were three in number and full of light.  He said he once knew a dwarf, who came from Egypt, who had a big diamond in one of his teeth. He thought it was for show. She had though of talking to the dwarf about having a gold bar made to put in her nose, if she could get the gold from Uishneach, to balance up the little lines forming all over her face. The druid laughed. It is the inner golden light of the soul that counts, not the diamond light in her mouth. Besides, he said to her face, that she was inclined to chew over things too much. She was a little grumpy about his smug remarks. She would try and not chew on it too much.

Sunshine coming through the branches

She looked out the door again. The sun was shining and a thaw had set in. She went to find the dwarf of the teeth. He showed her some replacement teeth he had, some shell and bones. Where did that bone come from she wondered, and as if he heard her, he noted it was from one of her ancestors and would probably fit in very well with her other teeth if he stitched it into place. She felt a little disgusted. He looked in her mouth and said he could probably repair her tooth, grind it smooth where it had become bald looking and finish off with some resin he had acquired. It would last a few years, he said.

The grille

She asked him about diamonds on her tooth and he said no bother if she had the diamonds and asked her would she like a gold grill as well. She did not have the gold. The dwarf and his assistant held her mouth open, almost dislodged her jaw, scuffed up her lips and generally made her feel smothered. But she forbore all this to have the nerve pain fixed, which it was. She bit the side of her jaw as the numbness wore off.

The pain stick was made from special wood and infused with the oil of the weeds.

When she visited her friends that evening, for a surprise birthday party, she complained about her tooth trials. They gave her the pain stick and some mint oils for her neck and jaw. Then they gave her a heated pillow of rice and she placed it on her neck to relieve the remaining pain and she settled into enjoying the party. There was marvelous music and Bart and Melone sang “Love is my religion.” Everyone joined in and a great time was had by all. The end.  

One of the musicians
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Angels and Stars

Angels of Joy visited today and left that lovely snow on top of everything, easy to brush away and eye candy for those of us in love with a white morning. The angel brought beauty to our eyes and delight to our feelings. We were in the snow globe looking out the windows everywhere to the white feathery flakes falling.

I made my way to the PT place and went into the wrong parking lot due to the cover of snow on everything. I locked my car. The parking signs were different but that did not stop me going toward the door. There I found a much different door and at last stopped and realized this was not where I was supposed to be. It felt a little surreal, like a dream even, until I realized what I had done.

I am working hard on getting my legs in order with the help of the PT team. I try and explain where I am at, to my therapist, fearing to be too enthusiastic, in case the treatment ceases, and at the same time knowing I am making some progress. Some healing is going on in the dark recesses of my psyche. Am I able to walk she asks. I avoid it like the plague I reply. In reality the pain levels have gone from a ten to a three. I am feeling warmer in my lower half all over. I am exercising their exercises for an hour or more each day.

In addition I am interspersing yoga breathing into my exercises, doing breath of fire sometimes and at other times other complicated yoga breath exercises I learned in my Kundalini class. These are accompanied with words, in another language, prayers really. And I am using my familiar Our Father to center me in my body also.

Bible study can be a lot of fun

And just for good measure I have an array of oils, some plain like castor oil, others like peanut and olive oil as well as pine needle and sassafras oil mixed. While I am doing all of the above I am rubbing in oil to offending places, fingers, neck, lower back, knees and feet to name a few. A yellow band is around my kness some of the time to create tension in the body part being exercised.After about an hour or more of the above, I go into my meditation period for a further time, totally relaxed, and ready for some silence, some releasing with the breath, some waiting to be blessed and some blessing of my own for others.I finish off with “The Lord is my shepherd” psalm 23.

Other modalities I am using are castor oil packs, and exercise in the water, hot tub, baths, gelatin salads with lots of raw vegetables and an alkaline diet in general, avoiding constipation like the plague also. This is working for the most part except when I travel home from New York, do not drink enough water and generally graze the potluck fare presented to me.

I have a castor oil consciousness as I have used castor oil packs since my twenties after reading about them in the Edgar Cayce Readings (edgarcayce.com.) Castor oil is known as the “Palm of Christ” in Europe. I did not hear of it in Ireland and my mother did not make use of it in any way. I love it as a massage oil. 

Mandala

As you can see from my agenda above it takes what it takes to change things around. But the big categories remain the same. Exercise, relaxation, diet, etc are all needed. Getting the unconscious involved for me is also part of what I am doing. I draw pictures of my hip pain sometimes and I feel that brings in another level of awareness and consciousness. The art brings me around the corner to see what will help, what will heal.

I love working with dreams. I sometimes am drawn around the corner and see more than is obvious. I love this connection that comes in amid the art and the attention to dreams. The Psychoanalytic is the way for me. I sprinkle in the cognitive behavioral as needed also as the both together are a great combination. Deciding what to do as a result of having a dream is acknowledging the unconscious, paying attention, being in the moment and disciplining self for a new way forward. The cognative/behavioral piece is “do the exercises, Rose.”

I loved visiting with my family in New York, taking a break from my life here in Harrisonburg. Being with my three grown children and my sister, who is soon to retire to Ireland was a lot of fun, especially the music connection. We made a music video under the direction of my music daughter and we laughed a lot.

I will conclude with a short piece I wrote after meditation:

We are the stars, five-pointed stars, meeting others at our points and getting closer into jigsaw puzzles. When we withdraw in meditation, in Jap, we go into a one pointed center in the center of our stars, that brings us close to others, as they are in their centers, and this is the place of the portal to the center of God, inside and outside, into the collective unconscious that holds those who can help us and those we want to help. Dreams may come from the collective center with some message for everyone or from the individual center to help me and others we are concerned with. Love from Rose.


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Addiction Support

I have been promising Adam Cook to put a guest article on my page for some time.  He is concerned with addictions. I was an addictions counselor in my earlier career before retiring and working with dream counseling. I love the way he lists out all the thing that are helpful.

Adam’s work in this article is to show us some important things to look out for in working through issues. His mission is aligned with AddictionHub’s to help people find support with issues relating to addiction.

The following is Adam’s article.

Artwork by Rose

Recovering from addiction is hard.  Determination is required to get past the isolation, mental blocks and depression of withdrawal.  It is, however, possible for addicts to overcome these issues. Here are a few tips for those in recovery to get their lives back on track, so they can truly thrive.

The importance of connectivity

One of the deepest human needs is for bonding on a deep level.  Social connectionis a critical part of overall mental health and well-being.  As such, the lack of connection is one of the main causes of addiction.  Over the past few decades, a lack of social bonding has been repeatedly tied to increased drug use. However, the opposite is also true, and, in many cases, inserting social interaction back into the life of an addict greatly eases the recovery process.  Connection is paramount in recovery, so getting into some kind of social group is critical. Consider joining a class – yoga and meditationclasses are easy to find and have the added benefit of helping develop your mental health. 

Mindfulness meditationhelps to focus yourself on the root causes of your addiction, ultimately allowing yourself to release the negative emotions and come to terms with your experiences.  In a group setting, it can also provide support in emotionally vulnerable moments. 

Follow a regular exercise regimen

Regular exercise has proven benefits to contribute to your recovery.  To start with, exercise– particularly cardio – releases good-feeling chemicals like endorphins and serotonin in your brain, which create a high feeling that may ease withdrawal and also boost feelings of self-value and self-esteem.  Addiction rewires the way your brain operates, but exercise helps foster the development of new neural pathways and creates new neurons in the hippocampus, which controls learning and memory.  Together, these neurological effects help to heal your brain. The best part is that there are plenty of exercise optionsto explore such as walking, swimming, or group fitness classes, and they all boost your recovery. 

The other major part of exercise is the establishment of a routine.  Routines combat withdrawal because they provide something for the recovering addict to expect and anticipate.  If you choose to do your daily exercise at the same time when you would have used drugs or alcohol, you can take care of that step in your routine while fostering your physical and mental health.  Finally, exercise also reduces the stress hormones in your body, making it easier for you to get a full night’s sleep and wake up refreshed the next day.

Spend time in nature

When you’re experiencing withdrawal, it can be tempting to sit quietly at home all the time. However, nature can be surprisingly helpful.  A series of studies found that people can feel psychologically renewed after just fifteen minutes of time spent outdoors.  Adding in a short walk or a deeper level of nature (a hiking trail as opposed to an urban park, for instance) heightened the positive effects.  Increasing the exposure to an hour or more began to show similar neurological effects to exercise, effects that could combat depression and increase feelings of interconnectivity.  

Additionally, it’s difficult to refocus your life when you’re dealing with constant levels of stress.  Nature can help – going for a walk outdoors each day significantly lower your regular, resting amount of stress hormones.  These effects have been even more pronounced in people dealing with disorders or addiction. 

Find a hobby you enjoy

One final simple way to reset your life is by acquiring a hobby or two.  While it may seem overly easy, having something that you enjoy and look forward to can be powerfully impactful for recovery, greatly reducing the chances of a relapse.  Learning a hobby in a group setting can also boost your self-confidence while providing a group of supportive, like-minded individuals. Finally, hobbies – even ones as simple as reading a book or birdwatching – stimulate your mind, forming additional neurons and extending your mind’s longevity.

The most important part of recovery is connection.  Whether you pursue meditation, group exercise classes, hiking, or birdwatching, try to find a group to join.  With time and support, you can overcome your addiction and begin to thrive.

Photo Credit: pexels.com

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FOLLOW YOUR NOSE

Follow Ur nose = FUN

I just followed my nose and went straight out to the lake instead of taking the corner over the bridge to home and that made all the difference.

There was a lone swan on the lake and I followed it around to try and get a good photo. When my back was turned, the swan became airborne and I heard those huge wings come into my vision and alongside my ears with an ethereal sound of their own. I fumbled with my camera only to miss the landing. It was a beautiful gift of the sound and the big wings beating with such grace in her peripheral vision. There was three other water foul close by the swan on the water. I felt the lonesomeness of the lone swan compared to those three small birds together. They had that white medallion shape along the side of their heads. 

Earlier this year I saw lots of fish roiling in the water and there is a sign up declaring the existence of the fish. There was a fisherman on my side of the lake, sitting in his jeep under the big white beach tree. He often got out to tend to his line but I saw no fish being caught there. 

After photographing the swan, I decided to follow my nose again over to the waterfall and the weir thinking it would be a lovely place to do my PT exercises by the flowing waters. I placed my coat as a yoga mat under me and I enjoyed the whole time singing my prayers, guessing how many I had completed and counting at times with my fingers. 

Water over the Weir

I am a water addict and I kept planning some foray into the water and counting my layers and deciding I could wear the inside layer and plop into the water. The water was bearable for a minute of two, as I lowered myself into the water near the weir where it was a few feet deep and flowing swiftly. After dressing I was regretting not dropping down the whole way so I leaned over the cement ledge and wash off my crown chakra. I entertained getting the back of my neck wet but opted for putting my hands in the water flowing over the weir in the hopes of straightening out my thumbs and washing off the pain of age. It was a lovely thing to do three times. 

Across from the waterfall there were two girls, who were dressed identically and looked like twins. Two little boys also dressed identically played there but looked different ages. A wren and a dog came by also. The owner of the dog said it was an Alaskan husky of some kind and he said the husky was “ancy” and wanted to go for a walk. The wren was barely visible in the hedge. A woman riding a horse was walking on the other side of the lake and stopped briefly to look at the lake. 

We are stars and at our points we connect with each other and can be very close as our starriness fits together with the others.  In meditation we go into the center of the star that is us and become a point of light that opens us to the help we seek. From there we reach the point when we can be of help to others by engaging with the light we find there and we can find the help we also need there and the healing  by engaging with the light we find there, sending it off in prayer in any direction we choose, even to Washington State where someone is trying to conceive a little incoming soul.

Brother Merton is said to have had an experience of the fourth dimension at the corner of 4thand Walnut street in Louisville in Kentucky. When on that street and people he gazed, everyone walking on that crowded Street, was filled with the light of God, and the face of God shone out of them all, on that holy day. This happened to him as a result of his striving for many years to reach God and he got into the star of himself and saw that we are all stars, golden. 

The promise is “I will give you the morning star” if you reach into the center where love resides, at the heart chakra. He got there and was blessed and blessed the others and us with the certain knowledge that all humans are all full of God’s Light. As my father once said in a dream, “We are all the same.” He was in a huge state, marching back and fourth trying to get this fact across to me. Merton was also bereft that the street walkers in Louville could not all see this blessing and be blessed. 

The lone woman rider came back by the lake galloping, with only her head and her horse’s head visible above the bank on a down hill part of the road near the mill. Then she came galloping along the road nearest me, where I fumbled again with my camera, only to miss a good shot of her facing me, as the sun blinded me. I could see then she had some colors close to my colors around her neck. She disappeared along that lake road she shared with the blue car. 

A grandfather came by covered in mud. He said he tried to cross a little stream but his feet slipped on the muddy bank and he went down. He laughed as he noted he was not letting his grandson near the lake water in case he might fall in too. The boy make very quick forays to the lake edge dipping his stick in the lake, before being called back by his muddied mindful grandfather. 

I am working on my dreams and the one about the needle came back and I caught a wind of the story of Sleeping Beauty as it trailed by me, almost loosing the awareness of it. Sleeping Beauty got a prick of some kind. Then she went asleep for a long time. I am trying to prevent getting the prick. So I do not fall asleep for the next twenty years before sailing off into the galaxies, looking for the boats headed for the streams of light. As Rumi, the Eastern Poet said “Do not go back to sleep.” It is a struggle to stay awake and keep the awareness coming in. 

After the dip

May you stay awake, may your dreams be clear, may you see the parallels in them, may you connect to what they are pointing at and find your way into more awareness. I look forward to your likes and comments and contact me if you would like a session with dream counseling. I look forward to hearing from you. Love from Rose. 

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Happy Thanksgiving

Yesterday was Thanksgiving Day and I am so very thankful for a number of things. I am thankful for my three grown children, one of whom was with me for this holiday. I am thankful that the food was delicious and the games were fun and the movie sublime for me. I am very thankful for a year that found my dream analysis business expanding out of my home. Finally I am calling in those who want to work with the dreams. I am thankful that I can use active imagination with my dreams and have a sense of what that is. I am so humbled and grateful for those who trust me with their dreams. I am so grateful to be entrusted with associations that bring the bearer out of the shadow, the hidden, into the possibility of release through the sharing of such secrets. 

Indoor plants. Last year it gave up lovely pink heart shaped flowers.

This morning it above thirty degrees in the porch after 10 am and I went outside to drink tea and do some physical therapy exercises later. When the sun came out beautifully, the temperature is a stunning 35 degrees. I cheated a little with an electric blanket around me or under me at times. The therapy exercises grow each week and I can easily spend over an hour working through. I try and combine it with some breathing yoga style and with some prayers to help with the counting. I hate to waste the time with just counting.

The birds came through the yard en-masse. There were a lot of cardinals that landed in the tree beside the porch, flying off just as soon as another five or six came through. I stopped counting them after 20, both male and females. They did not seem to be getting much to eat and did not tarry long. 

I was eating a salad of sorts. The birds do not care as they search for other fare.

A Carolina Wren takes my eyes off the cardinals. The warm brown over the head that spreads out to cover his back is lovely, ending in that little straight up tail, and the stripes along the side near the beak, help me watch the hypnotic movements of the wren. There was a group of sparrows under the tree in my neighbor’s yard that flew up into the tree as one, when they heard an alarm shriek from the Blue Jay that was also around. I saw two black eye juncos with the beautiful white breast and dark gray cover on their backs. 

“Go sin no more” was the injunction from Jesus to the people that he healed. He did not say to stay healed but “go sin no more” so I am thinking about that. I read into it in the Bible but do not seem too clear yet what it involves as I am looking for healing.  Over the years body workers have often healed me. I thought that their ministrations increased my circulation, and or brought healing and I would feel very comfortable for a few days. I once went to Hot Springs and stayed in the water for over an hour and that also made me feel healed for a few days. Sweat lodges too were great. So what does “go sin no more” mean in the hear and now. I stopped going to one therapist as I was impatient to heal myself, to gain an awareness from within. She had a marvelous way with energy and my impatience and slow moving awareness did not get me anywhere. 

Other crystals

I watched the Dark Crystal last evening as part of Thanksgiving Day festivities. It seems to be a magnificent allegory for the shadow and light side of things coming together. The two young Gelflings were a lovely portrayal of the innocent childlike ability to find the way, get the directions and to strike the lost shard of the crystal into the crystal and bring, light, healing and wholeness. One thousand years of peace was the promise, otherwise the evil Skeksies would continue to rule for another thousand years sucking the strength from the slaves and servants. Some think we are at that time now of wrenching ourselves into the fourth dimention, for those who are ready, to practice those things of the fourth dimension, like peace, patience, love and understanding. I am trying to de-potentiate that part of me that is Skeksie, but it often feels that rat that had a serious hold on my hand in one of my dreams. The deep inside is not easily dislodged. My meditation mentor mentioned that quote from Jesus about sinning no more, least something worse come into you to be dealt with. I reach up daily in meditation for that light. 

We drew mandalas after the movie and that opened some lovely conversations and may be there was a dream included. I seem to have depicted a number of shards of my own. There is a squaring of the circle motif also. I tried to not interfere with what wanted to happen, paying attention and yet not interfering too much with my frontal cortex engaged in chat and ended with a product with the crystal clear colors. Clean oranges and yellows predominate. See above.

This morning I am moved to make some representation of my hip and some tooth issue emerging and ended up with the picture above.  I had no idea it would end up as the turkey it is. I seem to be caught in the turkey, which is making me laugh. Laughing is always good. 

I am introspective in the morning for these past two days. I feel good now. May you go forth in thanksgiving for everything that life brings to you? As for me and my house, that is, my body, mind and soul, we will serve the Lord. Long may it continue and when the turkey takes over me in more ways than one, may I rush back for Oneness. All is One, One is All, There is only One. I will pray for you lovely readers. May you be in prayer often and I would feel it is a magnificent gift, a bonus for you to pray for me.  Love from Rose.

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The Cat and the Needle

Evidently a new kitten/cat visited the black cat, Cocoa, at Rose’s neighbor’s house and they just ran together at top speed along Rose’s porch and their paws caused the energy in Rose’s back to shiver as she had no way of seeing what she had her back to. The fast pace of eight paws hitting the wooden porch made a vibration that travelled up her chair into her back. Cocoa was having no use for this new upstart with startling black marking on his side, in his space. Rose’s cry as they hurdled past caused Cocoa to look back but after a little thought he hunkered down and crossed the road after that new invader. Cocoa’s mate, Tucks went under her porch after starting at Rose, asking permission, gauging the risk. She hoped he was just walking through. 

 When Cocoa, the black cat crossed her yard earlier to do his ablutions in the neighbor’s yard, he paused and almost stood in the Catalpa leaves but recoiled at the tinder sound of those leaves and went into the space under the hedge. He had to go and did so before going on his way.  Rose’s sister says there is a smell of cats in her front porch. Rose does not get it thankfully but worries about it nonetheless. When Cocoa, went near the dwarf maple tree, about ten black caped chickadees flew up about twenty feet away. Rose had not idea they were foraging there. 

My mother’s cat in the needle of her son’s arms.

The cold temperatures that triggered the leaf fall made the wren make little movements in the high hedge, barely noticeable, to keep warm as he foraged for food. The cardinal let out a few alarm calls, as the white cat stared at Rose in her porch space. The cat was wondering if he would come through the yard or stay behind the hedge on the footpath. He has grown and filled out and with a pretty face, even as he pauses to stare at her balefully, with a little fear in his foot as he hurries away.

Before the cold snap

Rose has the theme of twins running though her life and through her dreams in a most synchronistic way in the past few weeks. She was scheduled in counseling with a woman who was one of twins. She brought Rose a dream of two men, who seemed like twins. Rose prayed for incoming souls months ago and included twins she knew were gestating even though she did not know the mother. Then she met those identical twins the other day and they are some months old. Rose got to hold them and they were so precious with their dark eyes and lovely disposition. The mother pointed out the one whose head was born first but the other slipped out under and took the name of firstborn. It did not get any better than that for Rose who was so excited to hear all this even as she dreamed of twins in her own nighttime travels in the dream world. Rose is also in a group with a woman who had two sets of twins. Her twins are fraternal.

From the dream – wound to the hip

Then Rose was drawn to the story of the twins in the bible, Jacob and Esau.

Last night she dreams she is locked in a deadly embrace with another who has a big light colored needle and is trying to stick it into her. Rose was trying her best to avoid this pin being stuck into her and tried to stick it into the mattress. She also dreamed of three pens or stories or both. There was so many stories that the true story is not recognized and Rose is trying to hide the truth also, not be caught out in some way.   

The Esau and Jacob story is difficult to fully understand but Rose tried today to say it again in the light of her dream and it goes like this:

In the course of wrangling and wrestling in the night, the sword, the silver lit needle comes out to strike the nerve, the nerve of him/her that goes against God’s face and love. There is a need to cut it to make his/her thoughts obedient unto Christ. Jacob admitted his sins, his stealing, his killing and then he got the name change but in his case he also got a blast from the face of God that blew everything from Jacob even his tight sciatic nerve holding him in the limp of himself until the light filled into him from that burning needle filling his face with the face of God. He sees his brother’s face filled with what has come into his own. “Take these gifts, I sent you, because I see the face of God in you” says Jacob/Israel to his brother Esau. The enemy brother is changed also as Jacob comes to him a changed man.

A needle of red leaves

I hope you are recording three dreams that you can bring to me for a trashing session. There is nothing like the light that can come from a dream properly investigated. There may always be more to be distilled from them, but it will be solved by the next dream bringing its own adjustment. I can have blind spots about my own dreams but not so blind with those of others. I look forward to you note saying you want an appointment to work through a dream or two. Love from Rose.

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The Catalpa Leaves Falling

The Catalpa tree in the summer

The Catalpa leaves came down between the sunshine and the sunlit wall. As they fell then made a flight pattern down the house wall, along the blue boards of the prorch that draw Rose’s eye onto the space on the ground where they landed, on their sides among others, picking up the light of the low morning sun, one last time before lying down into their compost destination. A Carolina wren flew through those falling leaves catching Rose’s eye, her enquiry being, why was one to the leave flying? She soon realized that is was the little bird with the straight up tail ducking among the leaves falling from the tree. It was a surreal moment for Rose.

Leaves in the park

The leaves made their own sound, each one crinkling as they let go. They make the sound of a slow rain, splatting on leaves high up in a canopy, one set of sounds answering to another make by the two trees thirty feet apart in her yard.

Rose had a dream of a tall female neighbor, who is extra tall in the dream. Rose asked how they could not be better friends. And she got an answer. This female tall Goddess said it was because every time Rose calls on God, she is incoherent, burbling along, words not formed properly. Rose interpreted this to mean that in meditation she was burbling to herself and ignoring the phone to God. While God it throwing up that window to send down a blessing that there is not room enough to receive, Rose is burbling to her self about her grown children, her chickens and her battery, in which God has little interest.  This Spirit needs some silence so that the Rose can be in the right position to receive such holy blessings from above, bringing  both sides together to catch such blessings. 

a window to heaven

She has free will to think what she likes, to do what she wants without much insight and to phone whenever she wants, what she loves. She can stay looking behind into the past, in her stiff neckedness or she can swivel with beady eyes into her future. If she takes the trouble to sit and says it is the time to talk to God, then God only hears that incessant burble again and slams the window shut. She had the dream after a night time meditation which was less than centered even as she believes the try is counted. A little dream instruction to her to get herself centered. 

Phone to heaven

Rose’s connection to twins, in and out of the dream world, has brought her to the Esau/Jacob story in the Bible. Jacob hears that his brother is on his way with his army to catch up with his holy lying thieving brother. They were in their fifties or older. The birthright story and the story of the cows had gone back and fourth and there had been some scuffle between their respective peoples and so Esau decided to catch up with Jacob after twenty years. Jacob hastily makes decisions about where to position his wives, that which is female in him.

The circle of energy in which he placed himself

Then Jacob withdraws, and this time he does not burble up to God. He shuts up and is silenced. To help him, he creates the circle of stones near the ford in the river, with his head in the center. His instinct for a mandala to aid him is there as he settles for the night in the dark. He has a few hours to be a lightening rod for the help he needs from God. He phoned home. He put out the call. He is ready at last for a quickening, into another dimension, no longer interested in manipulation, living in this burbling way, getting and spending and laying waste the opportunity to climb the mountain of Meru to God.

From where the man came

So the “man” came to him in a vision and Jacob has to wrestle with him all night long. His wresting is all about this change Jacob wants. He wants to be certain of his outcome in the morning. The “man” gives him a wound in the thigh, helps him out, to let him let go of his selfish, of earthly oriented work- more wives, more cattle and more land.

Jacob and his wives

It involves a changing from what he wants into what the Spirit wants to bring to him so he is complete. He forgot that the covenant with his father Abraham included the stipulation that he and his would be essentially God’s people. He had forgotten this little detail.

To forget he was one of the chosen ones of the Spirit

But now he is serious, saying I want that something, that changes me from this to that. He no longer is counting the past and planning the future. He is in the present.

What is your name is the question?

The “man” asks him what his name is and he has to admit it is Jacob. The “man” seemed to be satisfied with this admittance and gave him a new name of “Israel,” a man who prevails with God. He is changed from Jacob, the selfish man thinking only of the things of this world, into the unified man of body and spirit, of the twins within, the hairy animal natural man and the spiritual man united within. Now he can go meet his outer twin and be united with him, which he was. He fell into his arms. He tried to give a gift to his brother saying he was able to now see the face of the Devine in his brother. What a gift did Jacob receive after his night of wrestling. 

Include the tiger as the natural component, needing to be included and loved and disciplined.

Rose is aware of this “love your enemy” law. She is practing sending out a prayer to any enemies, big or small.. May they be well etc… And likes the feeling this is bringing to her. She is also working with clients to see if they will entertain such radical injunctions. She is hoping to get a new name out of it eventually. Usually she burbles first about why they are her enemy and is trying to stop that. She does not extend this law to squirrels that come near her space, allowing her animal self, to hiss at them a bit and let them know they are to keep their distance and keep out of her attic space. More Buddha prayers may be needed to transform this in Rose.

Buddha prayers needed for squirrels

And if you want to weave a connection between your twin selves, your instinctual, nartual side and you intuitive spirit side, then working on dreams is really helpful. We need both sides of ourselves to make us complete and whole and we meet them in our dreams. I look forward to working with you and sending out a prayer for you. Love from Rose.

Keep dreaming

ps- like if you do and comment if something comes to you or if you had a laugh at my photo of Jacob and his wives. I laughed a bit when I did that. R

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